How do I make time for that?!

I was with a group of moms recently, and we were all bemoaning the status of our weight. "How do you find time to exercise?" a friend asked. Her question took me back 15 years to a conversation when I asked, "With all these children, a husband, home school--how do I find time for morning devotions?"

A friend gently responded, "You don't find time; you make time."

She then went on to teach me one of the most important lessons of my life. "Everyone has the same 24 hours," she said. "Nobody finds more time than someone else--they just make different uses of their 24 hours.

Time limits are really a gift from God. When you look at how you spend your time, you are looking at what you've made most important. The real question is--do you want your present time investments to define your life? If not, make some different choices."

While I was inwardly cringing (and a little resentful that she didn't have more sympathy for all that was on my plate), I couldn't deny the truth in her words. Everyone has the same 24 hours. If people were accomplishing things I was not, they were simply making different choices with their time.

Did I need to make some different choices?

More importantly--what time investments did I want to define my life?

Mike and I made the choice to let God define the size of our family. God was generous. That choice led to some time investments--diapers, nursings, spit-ups, settling quarrels. I wasn't missing the important; I was living the important. Just  realizing that I was spending my time on the priorities I wanted to define my life--the nurture and care of my children--made me feel less overwhelmed by the sense that others were doing so much more than me.

My friend's encouragement to make time for the important also pushed me to get up earlier to make time for being with God. If I truly wanted to nurture these children, I had to be fed and guided by Him. That couldn't happen without some time alone with Him. I had 20 minutes that could be spent on sleep or time with Him. I wanted time with Him more.

Recent life has taught me that sometimes life circumstances define our choices. Or, as God puts it, "The mind of a man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." Proverbs 16:9. Mike's stroke has me spending enormous time blocks on areas I would never choose--paperwork, therapy, the "man" jobs of the house. Yet, how I carry these out--emotionally, spiritually, physically--brings concreteness to the choice I made 30 years ago to be with Mike for better or worse till death parted us. I'm now spending my time keeping that promise. That's a legacy I want to leave.

As home schoolers our plates are so full. It's easy to go from one thing to the next. Yet, how we spend our time defines our lives. We won't just find time for the important. If we aren't accomplishing what we want--we must invest time differently.

Meanwhile, as we intentionally focus on where our time goes--we might just discover our passing moments really do live out the important. It's hard to anticipate how big choices will look day-to-day. When we intentionally examine our time and find we are living the priorities, we can thank God that the limits on time affirm that we are following His plan for our steps.

Tess Worrell writes and speaks to groups regarding issues of family life and living as a Godly woman. She and husband, Mike Worrell, live in Madison, Indiana, where they are in their 14th year of home schooling. She would love to hear your insights. Comment here or email her at tess@YourFamilyMatterstous.com. If you would like Tess to speak to your home school or church group, you can learn more about her speaking at YourFamilyMatterstous.com.

Recipe for Peace

How often do you feel at perfect peace? I have to admit that too often I feel frazzled and troubled. This tendency recently became crystal clear. It also pointed to some bad lessons I'm teaching my children.

We are trying to sell our home. This process has been hugely impacted by a tree falling our on deck, a water main breaking in our bathroom, and--most recently--a determination that our septic system needs addressing. When the health inspector came to render his insights, the predictions left me worried and feeling we might never get the house sale-worthy. My mind certainly wasn't fixed on God, and worry replaced peace. 

In His grace, when I sat at my computer, God brought Isaiah 26:3 to my attention."You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you." As I read the verse, God convicted me of the source of my worry--failure to keep my mind on God; failure to trust Him for helping with this. Moreover, He impressed on me the lesson I was teaching my children--to focus on problems, not God.

I gathered the children and admitted my fault. "Kiddos, I blew it. I know God has a plan for our future, and He is already taking care of us in it. He will guide this septic issue and make a way for us to do what is right. As I think about how good God is to us and how perfectly He can provide, I know He will take care of this, too. I know I sounded pretty worried. But, I talked to God, and I'm not scared now. I'm sorry I didn't go first to God. I'm more sorry I set such a bad example for you. Can you pray with me for God's guidance? Then, we'll sit back and see how God helps us."

Not only did peace pervade me--it pervaded our family.

As home schoolers we have so much to worry about. Are we meeting everyone's needs? Are we setting a good example? Are we preparing our children in all the ways they need? 

We have a promise to calm us. If we stay our minds on God and trust Him, He will keep us in perfect peace. It really doesn't get any better than that.

Tess Worrell writes and speaks to groups regarding issues of family life and living as a Godly woman. She and husband, Mike Worrell, live in Madison, Indiana, where they are in their 14th year of home schooling. She would love to hear your insights. Comment here or email her at tess@YourFamilyMatterstous.com. If you would like Tess to speak to your home school or church group, you can learn more about her speaking at YourFamilyMatterstous.com.

One Mother's Night Job

This post is dedicated to everyone

who has ever lain awake worrying over something,

or might ever be tempted to. . .

At 5:12 last Wednesday morning the lights came on.

No, not the electric lights.  Something dawned on my heart--and I realized something.

I awoke to use the bathroom, and as I got out of bed, I began to marvel.  The things I have historically worried about in the night are never the really "big" things.  The things I know I have absolutely no control over--and that are entirely in God's hands--are not the things that keep me awake.

No, what keeps me awake are those smaller things that I think I have some control over.  The things I think are up to me, that I somehow control the outcome of.  I lie awake concerned about how I am going to get them done.

And then it hit me.  This line I've drawn between what's in my control and what's in God's control is an illusion--it's a non-existent line!  There's really no difference at all.  He is sovereign over the big things, and He's no less sovereign over the small ones.  What ever was I thinking?!  He reminded me that apart from Him I can do nothing (John 15).  My life is fruitful only as I depend on Him.  And His power to mastermind and accomplish the big things is more than sufficient for the smaller things of my life.

So I resolved to retire from my night job as worrier.  I've known all along it wasn't right, but somehow, I kept getting pulled into it.  Without actually consciously acknowledging it, I sort of imagined that I ultimately had control over the things I stayed awake over.

I'm learning to trust Him more.

"Why are you in despair, O my soul?

And why have you become disturbed within me?

Hope in God,

for I shall again praise Him for the help of His presence.

The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime;

And His song will be with me in the night*,

A prayer to the God of my life.

Hope in God,

for I shall yet praise Him,

The help of my countenance, and my God."

Psalm 42:5, 8, 11b

P.S. * So I've taken a new a new night job (when I'm not asleep, that is).  I'm singing His song.

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

The Ticket Out of Your Comfort Zone

"Now to Him who is able to do

far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think,

according to the power that works within us,

to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus

to all generations forever and ever.

Amen."

Ephesians 3:20-21

For four days one week, two of my children and I were immersed in the world of homeschool speech and debate*, while attending one of the season's tournaments.  My daughter commented that one of the things that inspired her was that, regardless of level of polish, each and every one of the roughly 250 students who attended this national open tournament was not afraid to stand up and speak in front of others.  Considering that statistics say ninety-five percent of adults wouldn't take the podium if offered it, this was an amazing group of young people.  I sat back in awe as I marveled at their poise and professionalism, the likes of which many people twice their age are still lacking.  Some of them conducted themselves more like mastered-degreed executives than junior high and high school students.

How in the world did they come to be this way?  There may be a rare few who were born with a desire to speak.  Most of the others, though, came to this point, I believe, as a result of essential encouragement.  Public speaking hasn't always been within their comfort zones.

My daughter's story goes like this.  Back in 2006, I read about an oratory contest sponsored by the Optimist Club.  When I mentioned it to Megan, she promptly responded that there was no way she could write a speech that long (four to five minutes).  She surprised herself when her first draft was at least three times too long.  When she got it cut down to appropriate length, she still wasn't sure, though, that she could get up to deliver it--live and memorized.

But my philosophy on these things has always been that the only thing you can know for sure is that you never know until you try.   Well, she made it--through three levels of competition before getting beat. But never-mind winning or losing.  She was hooked on public speaking. When she had a message that came from her heart, she found she could face her fears.

The thing was, though, that she might never have done it at all without me essentially insisting she give it one try.  I never insisted that she do more than that.  I let her know I believed she could do it, even if she didn't believe it yet herself.  I knew that partly because my own mom had done the same for me.  Thank you, Mom!

The encouragement to try something new is truly essential for our children.  Too often their limited perspective prevents them from envisioning themselves doing--at all--a particular thing that lies outside their comfort zones, or it at least prevents them from envisioning success at it.  They might never discover a real passion for something without that essential encouragement to give something new a try, and without someone to encourage them in it.

The ticket out of our comfort zones often starts with a simple, little push and a healthy dose of encouragement.  And if that something new is clearly in line with the Lord's calling for His ambassadors, we can also be sure of His presence and enabling power.

Besides that, if all we undertake is for His glory anyway, then the pressure to personally succeed, by the culture's standard, is completely lifted off our shoulders.  It's not just about winning or losing.  The outcome is in the Lord's hands.  We just need to be willing.  "Lord, we want to honor You above all in this.  Teach us what You want us to learn in it, and make us a blessing to others through it."  That's been our approach to speech and debate.

For your family, it may not speech or debate, but something else.  I happen to believe that speaking skills are essential tools in the leader's toolbox, so I admit I am rather partial to speech activities, but in whatever new thing we or our children may be called to try, we can rest knowing that the ultimate outcome is in God's hands.  Our God, who does infinitely beyond what we could ever ask or think, just may have plans to use us for His glory in an area that we could never have imagined.  With that perspective, taking a step outside our comfort zones to try something new, for the sake of becoming a better equipped ambassador--or in some other way for the Kingdom of God, is not only the obvious path to choose, but it's really not so risky after all.

* If you think your family might like to explore speech and/or debate, you have a chance to do so February 12-15 in Greenwood, Indiana, (southside of Indianapolis).  The Tournament is in need of over 500 volunteer community judges, and you can sign up to be one at www.ncfca.org.  Click: "Judges," Indiana (on the map), "Hoosier Holler," and then click "sign up" to select a convenient time slot to judge.  Gather your friends and make a day of it--a field trip!  Bring your junior high and high school students along to observe and you may find your family enthusiastically immersed in the world of homeschool speech and debate by next season--reaping the fruits of the rich educational experience, as well as the fun.  For more info, see the thread titled Opportunity--Come explore speech and Debate by judging! on the IAHE's state-wide forum.

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

Thanksgiving--The Season That Never Ends

When we first returned from Ukraine with our newly adopted thirteen-year-old daughter, my dad went around the house with her, labeling things with sticky-notes.  Her repertoire of English vocabulary was very small, so he was helping to add to it.  I still smile when I remember his labeling of legs—"table leg," "chair leg," and "people leg."

Recently, I heard about another use for sticky-note labels that I've not been able to get out of my head.  Someone suggested that each of us ought to get two stacks of sticky-notes. On the notes in one stack, write the label "temporary" and attach those notes to everything that is just that—temporary.  Cars, computers, toys, furniture . . . even money.  You get the idea.  All the stuff that, in the end, will burn.  On the notes in the second stack, write "eternal" and stick those on people, because their souls are, in fact, eternal.

Even though I didn't actually make the labels, I now can't picture my stuff without seeing those labels attached in my mind.  And I find myself asking myself why I'm spending time on certain things that won't last or that won't impact the eternal in any way.

Surrounded by invisible labels, I've been thinking of their implication on my thanksgiving, too.  The temporary can certainly be cause for thanksgiving.  The glory and magnificence of the created world—all that we can see, taste, smell, hear, or touch—can point us to the wisdom and goodness of our Creator.  Majestic mountains, the cheerful sound of children's laughter, or the savory smell of pumpkin pie can inspire praise to our Father.  He is the one who gave us ears to hear.  He gave us eyes capable of seeing color and detecting depth.  He is the one who created flavor and gave us the ability to enjoy it.  As wonderful as the created world is though, it still gets a "temporary" label.  And that's really got me thinking.

I’ve tried to imagine being in what we'd be likely to call less-than-ideal circumstances.  What if I lost my sight?  What if I could no longer hear the laughter of children?  What if I were truly hungry or out in the cold?  What if my life were the one the Voice of the Martyrs magazine asked you to pray for?  What then?  In that light, a focus on the temporary seems terribly shallow.  What would I be thankful for then?  It would be the things that transcend and that can’t be stolen by circumstances good or bad.  Think of it!  If our joy is attached to the things that can’t be stolen, then our joy can’t be stolen either.  But if our joy is attached to temporary things . . .

God knows our hearts need a greater focus on the intangible blessings that are enduring, a focus that goes beyond thanksgiving for the albeit lovely, but nevertheless temporary.  It’s those eternal blessings that will remain and bring joy even when our lives are stripped of all those temporary things.

That's what the Apostle Peter was getting at in chapter one of his first letter:

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to obtain an inheritance which is imperishable and undefiled and will not fade away...”  

I find it interesting that Scripture focuses very little on the temporary, and even the examples of gratitude for temporary things point to God's character as Provider.  Not that I don't enjoy the temporary or won't be grateful for the blessings that I know will fade, but the temporary is definitely second tier, and the real issue is one of priorities.  Recognition of the enduring importance of the eternal is the cure for a hollow life.  Seeing with God's eternal perspective keeps us from being shallow.

So while I will still be thankful for temporary blessings, I'm all the more determined to cultivate an ardent attitude of gratitude for "every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places," as Paul says in Ephesians 1.  Though I can’t attach sticky-notes to them, they are no less real.  I want my joy to be anchored to the eternal, not to the temporary.  If I’m anchored to the eternal, I can't be shaken.  I’m convinced that’s what Peter was talking about as his first letter continues:

“In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials … and though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see Him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory … [Therefore] fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”

Yes, 'tis the season for being thankful.

If you know Jesus, the season never ends!

By the way, parents, if we model a life of heavenly aligned priorities, we equip our children well to live a truly rich life.

"Godliness actually is a means of great gain, when accompanied by contentment.

... Instruct those who are rich in this present world not to be conceited

or to fix their hope on the uncertainty of riches,

but on God, who richly supplies us with all things to enjoy."

I Timothy 6:6,17

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

Transcript Season

It's transcript season at our house, and I've been reminiscing.  One of my dear girls has started her last year of high school.  We have been through so much and learned so much together.  And most of it could never be reflected on a transcript.

Oh, yes, she has learned to balance chemical equations, to make bread and berry pie, to use imaginary numbers and subordinating conjunctions.  She can play the piano and tell you who Thaddeus Kosciuszko was.  But a transcript could never reflect who she has become.

In the progress of gathering up samples of her work for a portfolio, I came across a notebook wherein lay perhaps some of her most significant work.  It was work that went far deeper than history facts or geometry proofs.  It penetrated her heart and ignited something inside her.  This work hadn't been assigned for an official class.  It was what she had done during the time she devoted to God's Word at the beginning of the day during one of her school years.  The notebook contains the notes she made as she read through the Old Testament books of Joshua and Judges.

As I read through tears of joy, I saw that she had carefully catalogued, verse by verse, what was taking place, grouped the verses into logical divisions, and summarized the content.  She made observations on the overarching themes, and then applied them to her own life and the life of our nation with incredible insight.  God challenged her to align herself with His priorities, and she said, "Yes!"  He spoke, He revealed His faithfulness, and her faith grew.  And mine grew, too, as I read what the Lord had taught her.

Contrary to popular opinions of some, studying God's Word is no dry, meaningless, intellectual exercise; it has been a living and powerful shaping force in her life.  As I observe her attitudes today and hear her speak with passion, I know that the living God who revealed Himself in those passages has molded her faith with His own hand.

As we spend each passing day with our children, let's not forget that the most relevant things they will ever learn are the spiritual truths from God's Word that will anchor them long after they've left home and long after we have moved on to heaven ahead of them.

And more rewarding than anything that could be recorded on a transcript is knowing that our children's names are recorded in the Book Of Life.

". . . You know in all your hearts and in all your souls

that not one word of all the good words

which the LORD your God spoke concerning you has failed;

all have been fulfilled for you, not one of them has failed."

Joshua 23:14b

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

Dressing For Success

"Even a child is known by his actions, by whether his conduct is pure and right."

Proverbs 20:11 (NIV)

Want to make a good first impression and then maintain an impeccable reputation, too? Do you want your life to be a true success?

There's no big secret to it.  Really.  It all comes down to what you wear.  That's right--what you wear.

Now, before you decide somebody snatched my brain, let me explain.

Of course, true success starts with becoming one of God's people.  As His people, we represent Jesus--as His Ambassadors--not only to our family but to everyone we know, everywhere we go.  And we must dress accordingly.  So what do His Ambassadors wear?

Here's what one of the original Ambassadors of Christ wrote about it to the church at Colosse. 

"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, 

clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another.

Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity."

Colossians 3:12-14 (NIV)

Our foundational garment, which gives us a heart-level makeover, is the righteousness of Christ exchanged for our filthy rags of unrighteousness.  From there, godly fashion dictates that there are layers meant to be worn with it--compassion, kindness, humility gentleness, patience, and forgiveness.  And unlike our underwear, all of these lovely things should be showing.  Finally, crowning them all, the top layer is love.

Interestingly, this dress code reads a lot like the list of the fruit of the Holy Spirit in Galatians 5:22-23.  Getting properly dressed is a glorious combination of our cooperation and the Spirit's power.

Remember the story of the emperor who thought he was dressed in fancy new clothes but wasn't actually dressed at all?  How many times have we walked around, in fashion just as ridiculous, wearing nothing but our spiritual underclothes, so to speak, and a name-tag that says "Christian," while we're missing the rest of our necessary Ambassador attire?  Or worse yet, are there times we're still wearing the uniform of a soldier from our arch enemy's army--the very things we have been commanded to put off and lay aside?  ". . . Let us lay aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light" (Romans 13:12b NASB).

When we get dressed each morning, and every time we catch our reflection throughout the day, let's remember the dress code for Ambassadors.  When our work gets strenuous or the discussions heat up, let's not be tempted to shed the layers that are essential to our identity as Ambassadors of the King.  If we aren't properly dressed, no one will be inclined to take us seriously when we talk about Jesus--not our families or anyone else.

Let's teach our children by example what true dressing for success really means.

Who's with me for a good, deep closet cleaning?

P.S.  Fellow moms and dads, I'm thinking perhaps we could use clothing layers, some labels, and a touch of drama to make these truths come alive for our children. . .

Further food for thought or for sharing with your children:

II Corinthians 5:17-21  old and new, ambassadors, our sin exchanged for His righteousness
Colossians 3:1-17  new life, putting aside, putting something new on
James 1:21-25  what to lay aside, what to accept, the concept of a mirror, a life that's blessed
Ephesians 4:22-32  what to lay aside, what to put on
Hebrews 12:1-2  what to lay aside, endurance

For your convenience, each reference in the list above is linked to an on-line Bible.

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Held Together

Some days--especially at the start of a new school year--I look at what needs to be accomplished, and it’s overwhelming.  I’m already past the straw that broke the camel’s back.  If you were to but sneeze in my direction, I think I might actually fall to pieces.  Ever felt that way?

Look this way for a moment.

“Lift up your eyes on high and see who has created these stars,

the One who leads forth their host by number,

He calls them all by name;

Because of the greatness of His might and the strength of His power

not one of them is missing.”  Isaiah 40:26

Not one of them is missing.  Wow.

“For by Him all things were created,

both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible,

whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—

all things have been created by Him and for Him.

And He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.”

Colossians 1:16-17

Really?  Yes, all things.

So it’s no stretch to say He holds me together?  That’s right.

Not just holds you together, but holds you in His arms.

“The eternal God (eternal—as in not disintegrating anytime in the unforeseeable future) is a dwelling place (alternately translated refuge),

And underneath are the everlasting arms.”  Deuteronomy 33:27

(Parenthetical comments mine)

Whatever it is, you’ll make it.

In Him all things hold together.

And underneath are the everlasting arms.

Please, Lord, don’t let my heart ever forget it.

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

By The Will Of God

Ever had one of those days when you wonder if you're really up to the job of parenting?  I have. Some days I think of other mothers I know, and I'm quite sure they're probably doing a much better job of it than I.  Lord, how could you have entrusted me with these children?

Enter Colossians.  I warn you; if you don't want to be changed, stay away from God's Word.  If, on the other hand, you know your mind desperately needs renewing, then dive in.  If you want the biggest impact, commit it to memory.  You will never be the same.  It's exhilarating.  It gets inside your mind, deep into your heart, and even under your skin in a good sort of convicting way.

Okay, you've probably guessed; I've been memorizing Colossians.  And I didn't get past the first verse before it changed my outlook.  It just might change yours, too.  The book (the letter) opens with this:

"Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ,

by the will of God. . ."

Stop right there.  "Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ, by the will of God. . ."  His identity was wholly wrapped up in the will of God.  Who he was, where he was, his calling, his mission, and his role were all by the will of God.  And it came through in everything.  He opens five of his letters that way, and implies it at the beginning of three more of them.

Do you ever wish you could be that certain?  I mean in your particular role and calling.  In my case, Carol, husband to Scott, by the will of God; mother to Vera, by the will of God; mother to. . . here in Indiana.  You get the idea.  Try putting your own name in.  "____, ________, by the will of God."

Maybe that seems awkward, but if you are a believer in Jesus, you can be just as sure. He is working out His sovereign will in your life just as surely as He did in Paul's life, or Peter's, or any of those other famous guys' lives in the beginning days of His church. Very same God, you know.  And Peter reassured us in his second letter (II Peter 1:1) that we have received the same kind of faith as theirs.

We can be sure of our calling as His children and in the roles in which He has placed us. Not only that, but as Paul explained to the people in Athens, God even determines when and where we will live, so we can rest assured in that, too.  (Acts 17:24-27)

Listen in on Paul's prayer for the saints at Colossae,

". . . we have not ceased to pray for you

and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will

 in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so that

you may walk in a manner worthy of the Lord,

to please Him in all respects, bearing fruit in every good work,

and increasing in the knowledge of God;

strengthened with all power, according to His glorious might,

for the attaining of all steadfastness and patience;

joyously giving thanks to the Father,

who has qualified us to share in the inheritance of the saints in light."

Colossians 1:9-12

(emphasis mine)

When His wise sovereign will slips out of our focus, when we are filled with something other than the knowledge of His will, we get discouraged and down, questioning our calling, doubting the success of our mission, and we are tempted to give up.  All we can see are the challenges in front of us, which seem to mount by the minute and even gather strength against us.

But if, instead, we are filled with the knowledge of His will, then we understand that our circumstances are part of His elaborate plan for our good and His glory.  And we understand what He desires of us--those good works He has planned for us to do (Ephesians 2:10).  Then our trust is in Him, we are strengthened by His power, we can be patient and steadfast, and we bear fruit, because we know it isn't all up to us.  Even as we wait on His timing or an answer to prayer, we have a confidence that comes from knowing that He will accomplish His will in our lives.  We can be "joyously giving thanks" because we have a living hope (I Peter I:3) that rests in His will.

This "being filled with the knowledge of His will" is so very crucial that Epaphras, who had brought the gospel to Colossae, was "always laboring earnestly in his prayers" for the Colossian believers that they would "stand perfect and fully assured in all the will of God." Colossians 4:12 (emphasis mine)

I think we can be pretty sure that the answer to that prayer wouldn't be a discouraged person who says, "I just can't do this. . . Lord, this just isn't working!"  When we begin to doubt the roles we have, or the callings we've been given, we must remember that our sovereign God makes no mistakes.  Our identity--our calling, our role, who we are, where we are--is wholly wrapped up in His will.

Let us, too, earnestly ask the Lord that He would make us stand fully assured in all the will of God; that He would strengthen us with His power, according to His glorious might; and that we would steadfastly, patiently, and joyously give thanks, as we trust in His wisdom and His will.

"Now the God of peace,

who brought up from the dead the great Shepherd of the sheep. . . 

equip you in every good thing to do His will,

working in us that which is pleasing in His sight,

through Jesus Christ, to whom be the glory forever and ever.

Amen."

Hebrews 13:20-21

(emphasis mine)

P.S.  If you're looking for some especially encouraging Scriptures, I think you'll find Colossians 1, I Peter 1, and II Peter 1 are absolutely amazing.

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

Bird Mother Philosophy: Part III

Strangely, this is one of the hardest posts I've ever tried to write; it seems everything got in the way of writing it.  I am now wondering if there is some spiritual warfare going on over it, as the stakes in this endeavor of home education are incredibly high.  For even if we start strongly, with biblical reasons for homeschooling, Satan may subsequently distract us from a biblical educational framework, essentially pulling an educational bait-and-switch routine.  If, all the while, we still think we're doing the right thing, then the Enemy has won a significant victory over us, and we may not even realize it.

"I say this so no one may delude you with persuasive argument.

For even though I am absent in body, nevertheless I am with you in spirit,

rejoicing to see your good discipline and the stability of your faith in Christ.

As you therefore have received Christ Jesus the Lord,

so walk in Him,

having been firmly rooted

and now being built up in Him and established in your faith,

just as you were instructed,

and overflowing with gratitude.

See to it that no one take you captive

through philosophy and empty deception,

according to the tradition of men,

according to the elementary principles of the world,

rather than according to Christ.

For in Him all the fullness of Deity dwells in bodily form,

and in Him you have been made complete,

and He is the head over all rule and authority. . ." 

Colossians 2:4-10

[emphasis mine]

So how about that background check?  (See The Bird Mother Philosophy:  Part II)  Have you learned something about where the ideas and philosophies behind your educational methods have come from?  I've been doing some investigating of my own, with both reassuring and alarming results.  Some of the ideas I have been investigating are ones I have actually used and others have only been recommended to me.

Here are some examples of what I've discovered:

One philosophy of education comes from the ideas of an educator, most of whose ideas seem to be in line with biblical principles, who believed that children could comprehend much, even when very young, and should not be talked down to.

In another case, I found an entire framework for a very popular educational system based on ideas which are rather child-demeaning, from a woman who neither was an educator, nor raised any children, who admitted that she was unqualified to address the topic of education, and is known for both feminist writings and humanist ideas.

At the heart of another homeschool methodology, I found the idea that each child's spirit came from the spirit world and will be reincarnated into another body after it's current life. Shocking, yes, yet this idea is more common than you'd suspect.

At the opposite extreme, another system begins with laying a scriptural foundation of truth and then measures everything else against it.

In contrast to the "The Bird Mother Philosophy," one method starts with the idea that a child will construct his own thinking and should be left alone to explore a prepared environment, without direct instruction.

I started this series with an introduction to what I called "The Bird Mother Philosophy." The name given by its foremost advocate is Mediated Learning, and its central idea is basically this:  A child learns to think and reason well, which lays the groundwork for future independent learning, when the parent acts intentionally as mediator between the world and the child, preparing the child for encountering the world and presenting and explaining the world to the child.  This mediator supplies and explains meaning beyond the topic at hand, as well as how the topic at hand affects other areas of life.  I mention it, not to promote a particular construct of man as infallible, but simply to use it as an example of an educational philosophy which does seem to be consistent with God's revealed truth found in His word and consistent with what we observe in God's created world.

I honestly was amazed at the wide spectrum of ideas I discovered behind many popular homeschooling methods.  Some of the most alarming, which either contradict Biblical principles or are based on pagan worldviews, have a presence at even the more conservative homeschool convention exhibit halls.  I have come to realize that living by the oft quoted maxim, "All truth is God's truth," could land us in trouble if we are not discerning.  Perhaps it would be more accurate to say, "Not all so-called truth is really truth."  After all, just because it's called truth doesn't mean it is.  If it's not consistent with God's truth, it's not truth at all.

Since teaching our children is one of the most significant things that we will do as followers of Christ, it would follow that we would certainly apply the teachings in the Bible that relate to our Christian walk to the context of our children's education.  Paul instructs in I Corinthians 3:9-15 that we be careful how we build.  The Galatians, who started strongly anchored in Christ, were confronted by Paul for being bewitched into following man's teaching instead of Christ's.

God's truth, revealed in scripture, ought to be not only the catapult that launches us into homeschooling, but it should continue to drive, permeate, and purify our educational philosophy and methods.  If, after a biblical launch, we subsequently land on, and ride on, from there on out, a philosophical and methodological bandwagon driven by ideas not consistent with biblical principles, we are heading straight over a cliff.

Together let's press on to walk in Christ in our educational choices, seeing to it that we are not taken captive by empty deception, and recognizing that He is the head over all rule and authority, taking His Word as our starting point, the heart of all we do, and our final authority.  For how could we ever expect to see godly fruit produced from unbiblical roots?

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.


Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

Bird Mother Philosophy: Part II

My family and I recently had the opportunity to view the film IndoctriNation.  Wow!  I highly recommend it.  What a compelling telling of where a system of education ends up when it’s filled with unbiblical influences.   IndoctriNation issues a clear call to flee a godless system.

But we’re already homeschooling.   So our watching the film was just more preaching to the choir, right?

Wait!  Not so fast.  If we think we already get it, and we're sure we’re already doing what we need to do, I wonder if we’ve actually missed the point of IndoctriNation altogether.

“The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.”  (Proverbs 9:10)  If we’re going to live as God’s people, then His Word must, of course, be our starting point.

“This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success.”  (Joshua 1:8)  If we’re going to live as God’s people, then His Word and His ways must be not only our starting point, but also the very heart of all we do.

“Thus says the LORD, who created the heavens . . . ‘I am the LORD, and there is none else  . . . I am God and there is no other.’”  (Isaiah 45:18, 22b)  If we’re going to live as God’s people, in addition to being our starting point and the heart of all we do, His Word must also be our final word—our final authority.

His Word, then, should not be just the start to our days, not simply a jumping off point for our life strategy, and not merely the directional sign pointing us in the direction of home education—after which we seek out many other perspectives and voices.  Instead, His Word must remain the permeating and directing influence for all we do.

Have you ever thought about what that means for your homeschool educational philosophy?

What is your educational philosophy?  We all have one, whether we realize it or not.  We live by one, whether we’ve actually articulated it or not.  What has shaped it?  Do you know where the foundational ideas for your teaching methods and strategies came from?  (Not just where your initial idea to homeschool came from.)  Do you know whom you are following, even perhaps unwittingly, in your methods?

If we are going to live as God’s people, as we evaluate to whom we will listen regarding education, we must measure everything we hear by God’s Word.  If the messages or ideas are not consistent with what God already has revealed in His Word, they should not shape our ways—no matter how revered the sources may be.  And no matter how high or polished are the pedestals that fellow educators have built for those ideas.

On the other hand, if, and only if, an idea is consistent with God’s Word, then the source might actually be offering something worthy of further consideration.  But the only way to know what’s worthy of our consideration is to know God’s Word first.

Last time, I wrote about The Bird Mother Philosophy.  Before I say any more about it, though, I invite you to first take some time to consider your own working educational philosophy.  Think about who or what has influenced the way you think about and practice home education.  Do a little digging to find out who or what, in turn, shaped them, and to uncover what their ideas rest upon . . . a background check of sorts. . . and see what you discover.  I'm doing the same.

God’s opinion of the world’s wisdom, coming from those who do not worship Him, is not exactly high.  “ . . . They have no knowledge, who carry about their wooden idol, and pray to a god who cannot save.”  (Isaiah 45:20b)

Ultimately, if we are going to live as God’s people, the only foundation we have any business building on is God alone.

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.


Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

The Bird Mother Philosophy

As the traditional school calendar's schedule winds down, some families are not engaged in as much formal study.  But did you know that summer vacation, lived intentionally, will build thinking skills?  And your children won’t even realize their education is still in full swing.

I have friend whose life work is all about building thinking skills.  He tells the story of his observing two different mothers who brought their sons, who looked about five years old, to New York's Central Park one day.  The first mother was walking along with her son and they were engaged in conversation.  A bird flew overhead. 

“Do you see that bird?”  the mother asked, pointing.

“Yes!” replied the excited son.

“Do you know what kind of bird it is?”

“Yes,” the son answered, “It’s a __________.”

“Have we seen one like it before?”

“Oh, yes!”

"Where have you seen one, and when?”

“Mama, it was here, just yesterday.”

“Now why do you suppose that bird would be around here again today?”  the mother inquired.

“Maybe he has a nest near here,” the son offered with widening eyes.

“Let’s go look!” urged the mother, an obvious smile spreading over her face.

And at this point my friend says the two of them moved out of earshot and it would have been rude to follow, but they obviously continued in discussion as they followed the bird and were busily pointing up under a tree.

The second mother came walking with her son to the park, and, though it appeared that she and her son had a pleasant relationship, when they arrived, the mother took up her post on a bench and opened a Wall Street Journal, while the little boy skipped off to the playground.

My friend, who has made a life's work of studying how thinking skills are built, remarked that, though the second mother probably loved her son every bit as much as the first mother, it was the son of the "bird mother" who was being taught to think, and who would actually end up "smarter."

You see, the ability to think well, what the world calls intelligence, isn’t actually fixed. Children, and even adults, can learn to learn; they can learn to think well.  Science is finally catching up with God on this one, as scientists and educators are now beginning to acknowledge that the kind of parenting that God prescribes, in Deuteronomy 6 and Joshua 4, for example, is precisely the kind of content-rich, relationship-based interaction that builds intelligence--or thinking skills.

The experts are now admitting that thinking skills are actually built in relationships, and God, of course, knew it all along.

Why not adopt a methodology like He describes and watch your children thrive and grow in their ability to think, even without all the books this summer?  Engage them in conversations about anything and everything around you; ask them questions and let them pepper you with the same.  Figure things out together and seek out what God has to say about them, too.

And even when the school years ramps back up again, you just might want to reconsider solitary workbook time and trade much of it for real two-way conversations about the material instead--and find your children miles ahead.

Intrigued?

"The Bird Mother Philosophy:  Part II" coming next time I write . . .

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Passages

Our son graduated college today. At the last moment, he was informed he would graduate cum laud.

Amazing. My son who you couldn't pay to read. Who doodled his way through math. Who just wanted to go film movies in the backyard.

Admitted to one of the best colleges in Indiana, he pursued a Communications major which allowed him to go film movies in the backyard of Hanover College. Then, of London, England. Then, of Athens, Greece.

The admiration of my son as he walked across the platform to receive his diploma is impossible to describe. Added was the sense of utter relief. I hadn't ruined all chances of future success by home schooling him. I hadn't ruined all chances of future success by failing to meet every element of our curriculum. I hadn't ruined all chances of success by being a very imperfect mom and often not reacting as I should.

God is so incredibly faithful. I got up every morning and simply said, "God, please be our teacher today. Please guide and direct us. Show me how you are forming these children and guide to be your tool." Every day God put into place the elements of His plan for each child--Braden included.

God showed us Braden's amazing ability for making movies. God then provided a cheap camera and a bevy of friends and sibling willing to be directed. God provided a backyard perfect for bringing Braden's stories to life. God wrote His plan into Braden's life--guiding every step.

God promises to do that for each of us. We don't need to know the whole plan for schooling. We serve a God who knows the plan. We serve a God who simply asks that we faithfully show up each day ready to be guided by Him. Then, He works in our children to bring their passions and skills to fruition.

As I look at my first grader, I am so relieved. Because there are days you can't pay her to read. She doodles her way through math. She just wants to play with her stuffed animals on the front porch. Yet, I know God is kindling in her the passion for the call He has placed in her heart. Trusting God, I can look forward to the future He is writing for her.

The Invisible Work

"For I am confident of this very thing, 

that He who began a good work in you

will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus."

Philippians 1:6

October 31, 1992, we moved into our first house.  The frost had already come and the previous owner had graciously cleaned up the then essentially empty flower beds.  Before long, winter came and blanketed it all in snow.

Then one day it happened.  Spring weather came, and all over the landscape beds, flowers and plants of all kinds started popping up everywhere.  I couldn't understand it.  I had planted nothing.  Where was all this coming from?

Such was my introduction to perennial gardening.  What had looked like just a barren piece of ground virtually came alive when the time was right.  I was in awe.  Each day I just had to go out and inspect things to see what the next surprise would be.  I began pouring over books, trying to identify what was growing in my yard.  I was hooked.  And I would never be the same.

Twenty years later, the arrival of the perennial spring growing things still calls me to wonder and awe before the Creator who engineered it all.  And each spring I am reminded of a wonderfully reassuring truth.  Even though there are times when things may look like nothing good is happening on the surface, like all is dead, like no progress is being made, like there isn't any hope anymore, what we see is not all there is.  God is ever and always at work, behind the scenes, in ways we could never even imagine, carefully orchestrating His perfect plan.  Then, when the time is right, He shows us what He's been working on.

Maybe there is a situation in your home or your school circumstances that you have begun to despair about.  Perhaps it seems things have come to a standstill where you really need to see some progress.  Is there something you are tempted to lose hope about?

"I would have despaired

unless I had believed I would see the goodness of the LORD

in the land of the living.

Wait for the LORD;

Be strong and let your heart take courage;

Yes, wait for the LORD."

Psalm 27:14-15

Our gracious God is reminding us this season that He is at work even when it may look to us like nothing is happening.  When you see these spring growing things, remember that He is at work in your very own household as well.  What seems to us to be a permanent plateau in a child's learning or character development may actually be the time of God's invisible work.

When the time is right, we'll get to see what He's been working on.  Until then,

"Let us not lose heart in doing good,

for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary." 

Galatians 6:9


Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.