Doing the Job

"Why won't this thing just do its job?!"  With a pile of dishes to wash, my frustration mounted as the newly purchased stopper failed to keep dishwater in the sink. Despite repeated wiggling, the suds simply drained away. "It has one job! Why can't it just do what it was created to do?"

I wonder how often God asks that question about me.

Sometimes, in the middle of folding laundry or correcting a math assignment, I look across the room to find my husband deep in thought. As I watch him sitting alone, I begin to reflect, "When was the last time I made time just for him?" Going deeper I ask, "Have I had enough in-depth conversations to know what he's pondering right now? Have I kept up with the pressures on him--do I know what is bringing him joy?"

Too often I get too busy to focus on my husband. I focus instead on my half of  the load and let him focus on his. With a house full of children it's so easy to say, "He's the other adult--he is on his own."

But, God says, "He's not supposed to be on his own. He gets lonely on his own. When I created him, I said that loneliness wasn't good, so I made you." I know I was created, first and foremost, to be my husband's companion. Though God has certainly added other roles, the very reason for my being is to ease the innate, created loneliness of my husband. Genesis 2. I also know how deeply God loves my husband. I'm sure there are times God looks at my husband single-handedly shouldering his burdens and asks, "Why can't she just do her job?!"

I know how to make this happen. When he gets home, I can instruct the children not to interrupt unless there is gushing blood, take him to our room, and spend the first 20 minutes of his time home focusing all my attention on catching up on his day. I can plan an evening away--or at least an evening walk--to get the two of us out of the house, together and focused on each other. I can stop folding laundry and go sit with him. I can simply determine to do the job I was created to do--then trust God will show me how to get the rest done, too.

Everything is made for a purpose. If my frustration boils over the stopper's failure to keep water in a sink, how frustrated must God get when I fail to help and encourage the husband He gave to me. I need to remember my own plea, "Please, just do the job you were made to do."

Tess Worrell writes and speaks to groups regarding issues of family life and living as a Godly woman. She and husband, Mike Worrell, live in Madison, Indiana, where they are in their 14th year of home schooling. She would love to hear your insights. Comment here or email her at tess@YourFamilyMatterstous.com. If you would like Tess to speak to your home school or church group, you can learn more about her speaking at YourFamilyMatterstous.com.

In Step With The Spirit

Just think what our homes could be like

and how it would affect our children

if we were truly in step with the Spirit,

devoted moment by moment to God's purposes . . .

Only three verses in all of Scripture about her, but I’m convinced I would have loved her.  Anna was one amazing old lady in love with an amazing God.

Someone in her circumstances might have become overwhelmed, bitter, and lonely, being married only seven years before becoming a widow, but not Anna.  She spent her time attached to the Lord’s interests—and He communicated with her (she was a prophetess, says Luke 2:36).  Now as an 84 year old, “she never left the temple, serving night and day with fastings and prayers.”  (Luke 2:37)  I wonder just how long she had been doing this.

Nowadays, people twenty years younger than Anna was are retired, but not Anna.  She obviously wasn’t sitting around at home doing nothing or feeling sorry for herself.  No, she was in step with the Spirit.  “At that very moment . . .” as Simeon was prophesying about little eight-day-old Jesus as he held Him in his arms, she came up and starting giving thanks to God.  Oh, to be so close to Him, so in step with the Spirit, that when the Lord is doing something significant in my vicinity I, too, would be in the center of it, and not missing it.

Most of the people on the planet, whether young or old, let their own selfish purposes dictate their lives, but not Anna.  Anna let God’s purposes direct her time and energy.  She “continued to speak of Him to all those who were looking for the redemption of Jerusalem.”  (Luke 2:38)  Interestingly, it was those who were looking to see what God would do who got in on the news of what God was up to.  I wonder if the ones who weren’t looking for the redemption of Jerusalem ever found out what God was doing?

And that’s it.  Just three verses, yet her life has inspired and challenged mine.

Where is my focus?  On my situation or on the Lord’s interests?

Am I in step with His Spirit, or I am I too focused on me to see what He’s doing?

What directs my time and my energy?  Am I ready at any moment to step up and begin giving Him thanks?

O Lord, in all my days, I don’t want to miss even one moment of what You are doing or one opportunity to give You thanks!

Moment by moment, may I, too, be a praying woman who hears from You, keeps on speaking of You, and gives You thanks that others can hear.  Shape me in such a way that the simple snippets from my life would point others to bless Your name.

“Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.”

Galatians 5:25 (NIV)

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Scripture quotations taken from the NASB, except where otherwise specified.

One Mother's Night Job

This post is dedicated to everyone

who has ever lain awake worrying over something,

or might ever be tempted to. . .

At 5:12 last Wednesday morning the lights came on.

No, not the electric lights.  Something dawned on my heart--and I realized something.

I awoke to use the bathroom, and as I got out of bed, I began to marvel.  The things I have historically worried about in the night are never the really "big" things.  The things I know I have absolutely no control over--and that are entirely in God's hands--are not the things that keep me awake.

No, what keeps me awake are those smaller things that I think I have some control over.  The things I think are up to me, that I somehow control the outcome of.  I lie awake concerned about how I am going to get them done.

And then it hit me.  This line I've drawn between what's in my control and what's in God's control is an illusion--it's a non-existent line!  There's really no difference at all.  He is sovereign over the big things, and He's no less sovereign over the small ones.  What ever was I thinking?!  He reminded me that apart from Him I can do nothing (John 15).  My life is fruitful only as I depend on Him.  And His power to mastermind and accomplish the big things is more than sufficient for the smaller things of my life.

So I resolved to retire from my night job as worrier.  I've known all along it wasn't right, but somehow, I kept getting pulled into it.  Without actually consciously acknowledging it, I sort of imagined that I ultimately had control over the things I stayed awake over.

I'm learning to trust Him more.

"Why are you in despair, O my soul?

And why have you become disturbed within me?

Hope in God,

for I shall again praise Him for the help of His presence.

The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime;

And His song will be with me in the night*,

A prayer to the God of my life.

Hope in God,

for I shall yet praise Him,

The help of my countenance, and my God."

Psalm 42:5, 8, 11b

P.S. * So I've taken a new a new night job (when I'm not asleep, that is).  I'm singing His song.

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

New Year's Resolution--Defeat the Enemy Within

To look at Jessica*, you'd never guess what she faces on a daily basis. Long, rich brown hair, a lean well-shaped figure, and a smile that could light New York City. Yet, a deadly killer lives inside her--growing. In her second bout of cancer, Jessica fights a battle against the enemy within.

When I asked how she was doing and how I could pray, Jessica said simply, "Pray that God blesses all I'm doing to get this out of me." To defeat the cancer, Jessica has radically changed her life. She follows a strict nutritional regimen, exercises, and has retrained herself on managing stress. She knows her healing is ultimately in God's hands, but she endeavors to live a daily response to His healthy principles in the hopes that her body will fight off this killer.

In talking with her, I realize we are really no different. We both have an enemy within that threatens to destroy. We both ultimately rest in Jesus for our healing. At the same time we both have a daily duty to reorient our lives to respond to God's life-giving.

At this Christmas season, I live in awe of a God who would give up heaven, the adoration of angels, and limitlessness to come to a dirty stable, filled with mocking people, and be constrained by the helplessness of a newborn. Jesus did all this to personally say, "I love you, and I want you to know Me." I came to be here. . .with you.

I live in greater awe that He came as the means, not just of sharing life, but of saving us from the enemy in us. That He chooses to live in us to defeat that enemy.

I see Jessica's desperation. She knows her life is on the line. She has responded by fully committing to a way that leads to life. I pray to be that desperate.

I pray my desperation leads me to walk more closely with Christ. Knowing all He has already done, I pray that I can use this coming year to cooperate in His work in me more fully. To radically change my life and my lifestyle to be in full conformity with Him.

I pray for the daily commitment to looking into His eyes to see whether my actions please Him. To ask myself daily:

• Am I showing grace to my husband, children, friends, and strangers? 
• Are my reactions bathed in patience and gentleness? 
• Am I spending the best moments of my day talking with Jesus about His plans for my day and then the rest of the moments obediently carrying those out? 
• Am I willing to accept unanswered prayers and disappointments as a necessary part of God's plan rather than seeing them as a failure of God to reward me as I deserve? 
• Am I living for God or for me? 

As I look to the coming year--I long for so many things. That diversity can scatter my focus and leave me unproductive. Jessica has offered a lesson in focus. I resolve this year to pray daily for a dependency on God's work in me and a willingness to engage in those efforts in my control to live for Christ and for His work to bring healing and life to my soul. I pray for defeat of the enemy within.


* Name changed.


Tess Worrell writes and speaks to groups regarding issues of family life and living as a Godly woman. She and husband, Mike Worrell, live in Madison, Indiana, where they are in their 14th year of home schooling. She would love to hear your insights. Comment here or email her at tess@YourFamilyMatterstous.com. If you would like Tess to speak to your home school or church group, you can learn more about her speaking at YourFamilyMatterstous.com.

Can Good Be Bad?

“My kingdom is not of this world.”

 ~Jesus Christ, the Master and great Shepherd of the sheep

As recorded in John 19:36

If we have chosen to follow Christ, we have committed to a life that is clearly outside the world’s cultural norms and is governed by heavenly priorities instead.  The lives of those who have chosen to homeschool fall even farther outside cultural norms.  But even in the homeschool world, we are not immune to distraction from what is of central importance to our Lord.  In fact, especially in the homeschool world, we may be lulled into a false sense of security when it comes to our priorities.  It is often said that the good can be the enemy of the best.  It is of prime importance that we regularly take stock of our lives to make sure that we have not received His grace in vain.

Might it be possible that we have become yoked to things that are really not of Him?   (See II Corinthians 6.)   Are we honestly and truly not of this world?   Or could it be, that in spite of a valiant attempt to keep from being conformed to and entangled in “the world” and its pagan, cultural wrappings and trappings, we are sometimes unwittingly lured into what is simply an alternate “world” to keep us occupied?

 “Do not love the world, nor the things in the world.

If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

For all that is in the world,

the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life,

is not from the Father, but is from the world.

And the world is passing away, and also its lusts;

but the one who does the will of God abides forever.”

I John 2:15-17

Could it be that an obsession with a morally clean cultural world might serve Satan’s purposes just as well—to sufficiently distract us from God’s real priorities?

The world has dark and dirty hobbies to keep its lives too busy for God.  Those who claim to follow Christ may have refreshingly clean hobbies, which ironically, however, often accomplish the same end.  Neither group has much time for God’s priorities.  My fear is that we are far too often energetic—exceptionally so—for things that are empty, feverish in our activity for that which is fading.

The world’s teenagers follow the latest fashion trends—daringly envelope-pushing, immodest ones.  Meanwhile, Christian young people can be equally enthralled with fashion, except, of course, that theirs would tend toward modesty.

The men of the world love sports and beer.  Multitudes of Christian men, too, can talk of nothing but sports.  They just generally prefer a less addictive drink to go with it.

While the world may be addicted to the dark side of technology, the Church may be equally addicted to its cleaner forms.

The world takes it view of Christianity from everything but the Bible.  And tragedy of tragedies, so does most of the “Church”, as is evidenced by way it whole-heartedly embraces the core beliefs of the rest of the world’s religions, while having not a clue where the ideas have come from.

“As you therefore have received Christ Jesus the Lord,

so walk in Him. . . .

 See to it that no one takes you captive

through philosophy and empty deception,

according to the tradition of men,

according to the elementary principles of the world,

rather than according to Christ.”

Colossians 2:6, 8

Honestly, is what we let ourselves be consumed with actually prescribed in the Bible, or has some smooth talker just convinced us that it is?  Do we latch onto things, thinking they are worth our time, when in reality they, too, are passing away?  Are our priorities really the same as His?  

It is imperative that we ask ourselves these questions.  These are the kind of questions we need to be asking.  I have to ask myself these kinds of questions on a regular basis, and especially at holiday times when our schedules get even tighter than usual.  If we don’t ask ourselves these questions, and honestly stare the answers in the face, we may find that our dear Master is grieved with our hardness of heart and with our willingness to be distracted from what matters most to Him.

Lately, I’ve been reading the last letters of Peter and Paul (II Peter and II Timothy).  They’ve really gotten to me.  I have felt their emotion, as they knew their time on this earth was coming quickly to an end.  Those dear men, under the Spirit’s influence, were intensely passionate—and increasingly so, it seems, as they aged—that we should faithfully carry on what Jesus passed on to them, without getting sidetracked, deceived, or lead astray from their—and our—beloved Master.

I was going to share some verses from II Peter and II Timothy but couldn’t narrow them down; they were all too relevant.  So instead, I urge you to go pull out the actual letters and soak them up as you would precious pen and paper letters that just arrived today in your mailbox.  You certainly won’t regret it; in fact, it may save you from regret.

“And now, little children, abide in Him,

so that when He appears, we may have confidence

and not shrink away from Him in shame at His coming.”

~From yet another intensely devoted follower of Jesus Christ

As recorded in I John 2:26-28

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

Careful Listening

"Therefore consider carefully how you listen. Whoever has will be given more; whoever does not have, even what he thinks he has will be taken from him. ( Or, in NLT) To those who listen to my teaching, more understanding will be given. But for those who are not listening, even what they think they understand will be taken from them. "  Luke 8:18

As I was reading my Bible the other night this verse jumped out at me. It has stayed with me for days. Do I listen carefully to God?

I know my heart is to follow God. I truly want my children to know God, to follow God, to become Godly. But, my children are learning, by watching me, how to go through their daily moments. Do they see me pause to listen to God, or do they see me merely acting on what I think I know?

Sometimes I get so very busy. You know what it's like--the books, the laundry, the meals, the tests. With three children asking for attention at the same time, the others ready to jump in, and the phone ringing--sometimes I find it hard to think about anything that's not right in front of me. The quiet voice of God gets lost. He's speaking--but am I listening?

Other times, I don't even have the excuse of busyness. I'm just so focused on telling God all about what I'm feeling or asking Him to give me what I need, that I fail to sit and listen.

I think I know what God wants from me as a wife. I think I know how to guide my children toward behaviors that honor God and away from those that cut them off from relationship with Him. I think I know what we need to cover in school.  But, God's word says that if I stop listening carefully to Him, even what I think I know will be taken from me.

I need to carefully listen. Because knowing if I'm listening well can be a little harder with God, I can practice on the people in my life--especially my family. Do I listen carefully to my husband? my children? my friends? my pastor? Do our interactions show I'm taking the time to listen carefully and respond well? If I develop this habit with the concrete people in front of me, I'm much more likely to engage with the invisible God in a listening mode.

I want, I need, God to fill me with His wisdom and guidance in this wifing/mothering/home schooling life. Jesus warns, "Then, you must consider carefully how you listen."

Tess Worrell writes and speaks to groups regarding issues of family life and living as a Godly woman. She and husband, Mike Worrell, live in Madison, Indiana, where they are in their 14th year of home schooling. She would love to hear your insights. Comment here or email her at tess@YourFamilyMatterstous.com. If you would like Tess to speak to your home school or church group, you can learn more about her speaking at YourFamilyMatterstous.com.

More Taking It To Heart

I wasn't yet a mother when I first heard of the 'Terrible Two's'.  I have to tell you I was really troubled by the term.  It wasn't that I feared what would befall our household when we, Lord willing, would have a two-year-old of our own.  No, it was the fact that the term was being used in the very presence of the two-year-old personages being described in such terms.

What must the little ones have thought?  Maybe I'm in the minority, but I've always been inclined to think that our little ones comprehend far more that we often realize.  I determined then and there never to use the term to describe children, in or out of a child's presence.

And I determined that, if, Lord willing, we should be blessed with a two-year-old, we should refer to that year as the 'Treasured Two's' instead.

Granted, there are particular days with children, or even phases of life, which may present more challenges, shall we say, than others.  But it's amazing how much our own attitudes can affect the entire atmosphere of our home and imprint permanent messages on young hearts.  Even in the context of challenges, the valuing of our relationships should never diminish.

It's in this context that today I am 'taking it to heart'  (as I wrote about in a previous post titled The House of Mourning--Taking It To Heart).  None of us knows just how many days we will have on this earth, but the number is indeed finite.  The question becomes, then, as we take that to heart, "What do I most want my children to remember?"

Will their memories of preschool days be of a mommy who was continually checking her watch to see how many minutes were left to 'endure' until nap time, when her relief would surely come?   Or will their memories be of a mommy who obviously treasured each moment her children were awake, openly grateful for the sweet conversations and chances to pour truth into their little hearts and minds?

Will the children who attend school outside the home hear their mommy singing 'It's The Most Wonderful Time of The Year' when she can't wait to get them out of the house at the start of each school year?  (I've actually heard this.)  Or will their mommy be even more excited than they are for a school-cancelled snow day to spend together?  (Thankfully, I've seen this, too!)

Are our homeschooled children conscious that we are just checking off a list of stuff that must be done together for school?  Or do they know that their mama, though exhausted at times, would gladly choose their life of learning together over anything else she might be doing with her time?

In the context of what I want my children to remember, what should I be communicating? How should I be saying it?  By what actions?  How often?  In what tone?  How does what I want my children to remember translate into daily practicalities?

Yes, indeed, the living takes it to heart. . .

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.