The Bird Mother Philosophy

As the traditional school calendar's schedule winds down, some families are not engaged in as much formal study.  But did you know that summer vacation, lived intentionally, will build thinking skills?  And your children won’t even realize their education is still in full swing.

I have friend whose life work is all about building thinking skills.  He tells the story of his observing two different mothers who brought their sons, who looked about five years old, to New York's Central Park one day.  The first mother was walking along with her son and they were engaged in conversation.  A bird flew overhead. 

“Do you see that bird?”  the mother asked, pointing.

“Yes!” replied the excited son.

“Do you know what kind of bird it is?”

“Yes,” the son answered, “It’s a __________.”

“Have we seen one like it before?”

“Oh, yes!”

"Where have you seen one, and when?”

“Mama, it was here, just yesterday.”

“Now why do you suppose that bird would be around here again today?”  the mother inquired.

“Maybe he has a nest near here,” the son offered with widening eyes.

“Let’s go look!” urged the mother, an obvious smile spreading over her face.

And at this point my friend says the two of them moved out of earshot and it would have been rude to follow, but they obviously continued in discussion as they followed the bird and were busily pointing up under a tree.

The second mother came walking with her son to the park, and, though it appeared that she and her son had a pleasant relationship, when they arrived, the mother took up her post on a bench and opened a Wall Street Journal, while the little boy skipped off to the playground.

My friend, who has made a life's work of studying how thinking skills are built, remarked that, though the second mother probably loved her son every bit as much as the first mother, it was the son of the "bird mother" who was being taught to think, and who would actually end up "smarter."

You see, the ability to think well, what the world calls intelligence, isn’t actually fixed. Children, and even adults, can learn to learn; they can learn to think well.  Science is finally catching up with God on this one, as scientists and educators are now beginning to acknowledge that the kind of parenting that God prescribes, in Deuteronomy 6 and Joshua 4, for example, is precisely the kind of content-rich, relationship-based interaction that builds intelligence--or thinking skills.

The experts are now admitting that thinking skills are actually built in relationships, and God, of course, knew it all along.

Why not adopt a methodology like He describes and watch your children thrive and grow in their ability to think, even without all the books this summer?  Engage them in conversations about anything and everything around you; ask them questions and let them pepper you with the same.  Figure things out together and seek out what God has to say about them, too.

And even when the school years ramps back up again, you just might want to reconsider solitary workbook time and trade much of it for real two-way conversations about the material instead--and find your children miles ahead.

Intrigued?

"The Bird Mother Philosophy:  Part II" coming next time I write . . .

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.