Dressing For Success

"Even a child is known by his actions, by whether his conduct is pure and right."

Proverbs 20:11 (NIV)

Want to make a good first impression and then maintain an impeccable reputation, too? Do you want your life to be a true success?

There's no big secret to it.  Really.  It all comes down to what you wear.  That's right--what you wear.

Now, before you decide somebody snatched my brain, let me explain.

Of course, true success starts with becoming one of God's people.  As His people, we represent Jesus--as His Ambassadors--not only to our family but to everyone we know, everywhere we go.  And we must dress accordingly.  So what do His Ambassadors wear?

Here's what one of the original Ambassadors of Christ wrote about it to the church at Colosse. 

"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, 

clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another.

Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity."

Colossians 3:12-14 (NIV)

Our foundational garment, which gives us a heart-level makeover, is the righteousness of Christ exchanged for our filthy rags of unrighteousness.  From there, godly fashion dictates that there are layers meant to be worn with it--compassion, kindness, humility gentleness, patience, and forgiveness.  And unlike our underwear, all of these lovely things should be showing.  Finally, crowning them all, the top layer is love.

Interestingly, this dress code reads a lot like the list of the fruit of the Holy Spirit in Galatians 5:22-23.  Getting properly dressed is a glorious combination of our cooperation and the Spirit's power.

Remember the story of the emperor who thought he was dressed in fancy new clothes but wasn't actually dressed at all?  How many times have we walked around, in fashion just as ridiculous, wearing nothing but our spiritual underclothes, so to speak, and a name-tag that says "Christian," while we're missing the rest of our necessary Ambassador attire?  Or worse yet, are there times we're still wearing the uniform of a soldier from our arch enemy's army--the very things we have been commanded to put off and lay aside?  ". . . Let us lay aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light" (Romans 13:12b NASB).

When we get dressed each morning, and every time we catch our reflection throughout the day, let's remember the dress code for Ambassadors.  When our work gets strenuous or the discussions heat up, let's not be tempted to shed the layers that are essential to our identity as Ambassadors of the King.  If we aren't properly dressed, no one will be inclined to take us seriously when we talk about Jesus--not our families or anyone else.

Let's teach our children by example what true dressing for success really means.

Who's with me for a good, deep closet cleaning?

P.S.  Fellow moms and dads, I'm thinking perhaps we could use clothing layers, some labels, and a touch of drama to make these truths come alive for our children. . .

Further food for thought or for sharing with your children:

II Corinthians 5:17-21  old and new, ambassadors, our sin exchanged for His righteousness
Colossians 3:1-17  new life, putting aside, putting something new on
James 1:21-25  what to lay aside, what to accept, the concept of a mirror, a life that's blessed
Ephesians 4:22-32  what to lay aside, what to put on
Hebrews 12:1-2  what to lay aside, endurance

For your convenience, each reference in the list above is linked to an on-line Bible.

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Held Together

Some days--especially at the start of a new school year--I look at what needs to be accomplished, and it’s overwhelming.  I’m already past the straw that broke the camel’s back.  If you were to but sneeze in my direction, I think I might actually fall to pieces.  Ever felt that way?

Look this way for a moment.

“Lift up your eyes on high and see who has created these stars,

the One who leads forth their host by number,

He calls them all by name;

Because of the greatness of His might and the strength of His power

not one of them is missing.”  Isaiah 40:26

Not one of them is missing.  Wow.

“For by Him all things were created,

both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible,

whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—

all things have been created by Him and for Him.

And He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.”

Colossians 1:16-17

Really?  Yes, all things.

So it’s no stretch to say He holds me together?  That’s right.

Not just holds you together, but holds you in His arms.

“The eternal God (eternal—as in not disintegrating anytime in the unforeseeable future) is a dwelling place (alternately translated refuge),

And underneath are the everlasting arms.”  Deuteronomy 33:27

(Parenthetical comments mine)

Whatever it is, you’ll make it.

In Him all things hold together.

And underneath are the everlasting arms.

Please, Lord, don’t let my heart ever forget it.

Homeschooling with her husband, Scott, since 2001, Carol believes nothing is too difficult for God.  She is a passionate encourager and loves using creative means--including writing music, singing, speaking, and blogging--to encourage others to trust God through all the adventures He calls them to.  You can read more from her at her Unsmotherable Delight blog (udelight.blogspot.com), where you'll find faith-filled original songs, favorite scriptures, family stories, and even a little film about adoption, all designed to inspire and lift your spirit.  Her original 'theme song' titled Captain's Anthem can be heard on Vimeo at http://vimeo.com/30769152.

Scripture quotations taken from the NASB.

Top Tips for Starting a New Year

We have been incredibly blessed by experienced home schoolers sharing their wisdom for successful home schooling. As many of us begin our year--and for those who have already begun--here are a few tips that others gave us and that have stood the test of 15 years of home schooling.

Tip 1: Put Bible first.
We heard this from several friends before we began our home schooling journey. I filed the tip away, looked at our curriculum, and immediately decided to begin with math in order to get the hardest subject out of the way first. We loved Bible. I was sure we would get to it after we got the hard stuff done.

Two months later, when I was drowning in a sea of confusion and fear, I remembered those words from a quiet, home schooling acquaintance, "Put Bible first." I altered our schedule. Morning worship and study of scripture became the first focus of our day.

Math didn't suddenly become easy. Children didn't suddenly become friction-free. The day's schedule didn't suddenly sprout two more hours giving us the breathing room I desired. But, our home schooling did  change--for the better. Our focus changed as we focused first on God and His desires for our day. I went from asking His blessing as icing on the cake to seeking His blessing as the foundation of the day. His truths became the first priority and the  rest of school became a way to explore these truths in specific subject areas. Our day became bathed in prayer--not just by me, but by our whole family. Best tip ever--put worship/Bible first.

Tip 2: Focus on character.
"Focus on character and the academics will follow," said a home schooling mom that I met once in a "chance encounter" in an airport. Truer words were never spoken. This mom shared that her husband had set the priority of always focusing first on character. "He never worried about the academics. He was sure that if we focused on developing our children's character to conform to God's, God would take care of the rest. We have graduated 3 of our 9 children. Two received full scholarships to the college of their choice and the third is pursuing an internship before going to college. God has truly taken care of the rest."

To be sure, we can't be lazy about academics--but laziness is lousy character, so we wouldn't choose that. We teach character when we urge our children to persevere through a rough math assignment or stick with creating a science diorama. We teach character when we insist that our children treat each other with the "one-anothers" of scripture such as putting up with one another, loving one another, encouraging one another.

Academics have value in themselves. But, their greatest value is as a concrete testing ground for proving character. Will our child pursue excellence when wrestling with a complicated theory? Will our child develop patience to help a younger sibling? Will our child develop the courage to present the biblical view of issues we're reading at home in the face of persuasive, popular alternative theories offered in youth group at church? When we view all of school as the opportunity to shape character--we make the most of our home schooling endeavors. God will truly take care of the rest.

Tip 3: Treat all of life as school.
Too often I get caught up in the books. Are we on schedule? Have we finished our worksheets? A dear friend's motto, "All of life teaches, and some of the best lessons can't come from books." More importantly--children remember what they do far more than what they read about. When the family travels to help a sick member through an illness--children learn how to put compassion into action, how to balance competing priorities, and how to deal with emergencies. Trips to the grocery teach nutrition, budgeting, and meal-planning. Trips to the library offer opportunities to show manners and consideration to strangers. Our children will constantly face these issues as adults and the life experience prepares them. Further, our children are far more interested in the leaf they discover or the bird they spy at the feeder. When we pause to explore these real-life connections, our children learn and remember far more than simply passing eyes over a science text page so they can say they are done.

Tip 4: Keep school manageable--enjoy your children.
I've seen a lot of families begin home schooling. I've seen a lot of families quit. Most often they quit because they become overwhelmed. Don't. Every curriculum has its strengths--every curriculum has its weaknesses. Parents who try to fix every weakness with another curriculum soon become so weary (and their children so overwhelmed and rebellious) that they feel like failures and send the children back to school. Parents who stick with a curriculum they dislike because its "what everyone else does" grow weary. Parents who try to do every single element no matter how irrelevant it seems grow weary.

What excites you about learning? Choose a curriculum that helps you focus on that. Sure, school is work--but it shouldn't be drudgery. Yes, your curriculum will have gaps. Let those go. If you are faithful in doing what God sets before you, He will fill the gaps. More importantly you free yourself and your children to spend your days enjoying learning together. You have time to focus on the individuality of each child and nurture God's design of them. Life opens into an adventure of learning you enjoy together. An adventure you don't want to give up no matter how bad an individual day might be.

May God bless the beginning of your school year. May He guide and sustain your efforts. May He unite your family in a common vision for the coming year.

Tess Worrell writes and speaks to groups regarding issues of family life and living as a Godly woman. She and husband, Mike Worrell, live in Madison, Indiana, where they are in their 14th year of home schooling. She would love to hear your insights. Comment here or email her at tess@YourFamilyMatterstous.com. If you would like Tess to speak to your home school or church group, you can learn more about her speaking at YourFamilyMatterstous.com.

"A kindhearted woman gains respect." Prov.11:16a

How many moms long for their children to respect them? I know I do. 

Respect conveys a starting assumption that the other person is valued--worthy of listening to and regarding well. I've seen other moms strive for respect, long for respect, and even demand respect. Yet, how often do we see kindness as a  key component of gaining what we so desire? When I came across this verse recently, I was struck by the simple prescription. And how often I may miss it.

In my desire to train up my children well, I too often confuse respect with agreement. When disagreement comes, I can easily fall into a tug of war with my children and lose sight of being kind in the effort to demonstrate I am right. In the busyness of life, I too often focus on getting people where they need to be or accomplishing an endless to-do list and lose sight of being kind in the effort to be on time. In trying to impose order on a house that seemingly insists on falling into disarray no matter how much I work, I can begin to order my children like servants and lose sight of being kind in the effort to be done.

To be sure, respect contains many other components. Yet, I as I engage in discussions, steer my family to destinations, or ask for help with chores I am struck anew by the need to focus on letting the fruit of the Spirit guide my everyday interactions--in particular the fruit of kindness. In so doing, I may gain the very respect that becomes the foundation of all the mothering God calls me to do.

Tess Worrell writes and speaks to groups regarding issues of family life and living as a Godly woman. She and husband, Mike Worrell, live in Madison, Indiana, where they are in their 14th year of home schooling. She would love to hear your insights. Comment here or email her at tess@YourFamilyMatterstous.com. If you would like Tess to speak to your home school or church group, you can learn more about her speaking at YourFamilyMatterstous.com.